envy

i went to one of the most expensive private college in my country, it is a given that i've known few ridiculously rich people, and saw batshit insane rich people.

when i see that batshit insane rich people, sometimes i wonder, is there anything that surprised them anymore? anything they deeply long for?

before you ask how some ordinary middle class like me went to that university, it's a combination of lazy high school days, and wanted to play football weekly for the next 4-5 years, and this is the only university that have that programe. and of course  parents that would do everything for education.

back to my curiosity.

i mean i just started my life, or career, or whatever you want to call it, i'm 25 this november, and there's so fucking much i want to do in life, not all related to money, but it will help.

them? what do they want? getting richer? living aimlessly till death come knocking at their door? 

to be honest, i envy them.

i'm not envying their money per se, i'm just envying their financial security.

i got bored? hopped in a plane, go to a vacation for 2 weeks. normal people can't do that, they're bound to at least only 12 paid vacation days a year, and monthly bills.

but then again at least i have a reason to wake up everyday, i have a goal to achieve, and hopefully i'll be there before 40. 

Bus girl.

i guess, the beauty of using mass transportation is that every once in a while, you see a creature so beautiful, the cynics in you wonder why the hell she's using this cheap ass busses. i mean we're all somehow feels beauty made life easier, right?

but fuck that, i'm feeling romantic today.

if anything, it taught me that beauty can be found anywhere. i mean with all these internet shits and giggles, we all think everyone else but us is happy as fuck, that these instagram beauties and handsomes are somehow either born fucking rich, or just happen knows some fashion dude to endorse them, when in fact, if my two weeks of transjakarta-ing  teach me anything, it's the opposite.

you see beautiful people in mass transportation, and that somehow humanize them, it removes all the filters and reduce them for what they really are: a person trying to earn money, to earn a good life,  to survive, and now the world isn't so bad anymore.

and of course, sometimes you fantasize a whole story between you and that person, create personality based on how they present themselves - what they wear, their cadence, their expression. 

that beautiful girl from the bus now probably watching some tv's, texting their loved ones, worrying about bills and rent, and of course their job.